Positive Parenting Strategies

Play – Through play, we join our kids in their world. We help them express and understand deep emotions, foster connection, aid the process of emotional healing--and have a great time ourselves while we're at it.

Use Humor - Humor helps reduce frustration, diffuse intensity, and win cooperation.

Offer Choices - Instead of giving orders, give your child a "sense" of control by offering them two choices. Children are more willing to cooperate if they feel like they have some control over the process. Give them some “control” throughout the day and you will notice a big difference in their level of cooperation.

Be Consistent - Include even the youngest children in making "Family Rules". Then stick to them. It's confusing for children when rules are only enforced some of the time. Only set limits you know you can enforce and then be prepared to take a stand.

Use Time In - Time in is the time you spend encouraging your child's "good" behavior instead of just working on changing his "bad" behavior.

Be Respectful – Even when they are doing something you hate, always show respect with your words and actions. Treat your child as you want him or her to treat you as well as others.

Say Yes! by using the "When . . . Then" method – If you are looking for cooperation, yes will always work better than no. Try rephrasing the situation to start the sentence with yes. For example: Your child wants to eat ice cream but it is almost time for dinner. Instead of saying no and risking a confrontation or temper tantrum, say Yes! “Yes, when you eat your dinner, then you may have ice cream.” Don’t for get to stick to it!

Listen – Listen for understanding. This requires that you stop what you are doing and think about what our child is saying. In difficult situations, stop, get on her level, and look at her. Then say, “I am listening. I am trying to understand what you need or want.” Then listen.